My old Twitter followers and ex-readers were probably very sad to hear I'd started up my blog again. With the kids moved out I have no companionship other than beer and Twitter.
Drinking home alone is never a good sign. Don't worry drinking isn't binge drinking or a regular occurrence, it makes me feel like shit but a few pints help me relax and sleep better.
I figure I may need some help and input with it. The blog that is not the beer. It's been a while since I drank or blogged anything. I'm trying to get back into blogging to stop the boredom and loneliness eating away at me.
Tech confuses and frustrates me. This blog is a mess but it's my mess. I am not sure how I thought this was going to make things better. The writing just isn't happening. I'm at 59% of my life and death is slowly approaching. It is fair to say I haven't accomplished much apart from a roof over my head, a great marriage and our two wonderful kids, Luke and Lucy. X
You can see the years heavily imprinted on my face and other body parts. The battle wounds of life, mental illness and grief splattered on my heart. It triggers another bout of depression.
Today feels like a failure. My energy levels are down. Socially I can just about manage going to work for something to do. It serves a distraction as well as an income.
I have nothing to do right now. Sitting around and drinking is never good unless you have some company. I could always go for a walk in the rain and wash off my blues. Sadly life is not that simple and the rain can't wash away grief.
It's a sad blog. I know the from experience that feeling will go away. Hopefully the next post will have some direction, be more interesting and less depressing.
